That One Time I Didn’t Take My Flight Home

Tuesday, May 17, 2016

I’m internally freaking out as my dad tells me I’m probably going to miss my flight.  He won’t stop talking about how bad the security lines are and tells me to call him if I end up needing him to come back for me.  I don’t say anything as we arrive at O’Hare International Airport because all I can think about is how crushed I’ll be if I don’t make it to Denver today.  I’ve been trying to fly out and see my best friend from college, Carly, since she moved out there a year ago.  I’m afraid to look inside at the line.

My anxiety dissipates as soon as I’m inside the airport because there’s literally no one there.  I’m through security in minutes and call my dad to yell at him for making me so unnecessarily nervous!  Now I have almost 3 hours to kill before my flight.  Why was I even worried…

Colorado is such a treat.  It’s my first time in the state (my first time in the West in general), and I’m having myself a week. I go on a bike ride/brewery date with a bartender I meet the first night out, save a baby bunny from a window well, get my first bloody nose from the change in altitude (always blame everything on the altitude), and venture out to Breckenridge to play in the mountains.

Carly’s brother, Kyle, lives in Breck and shows us around (I’m absolutely in love with the mountains), then takes us rock climbing.  I’ve never climbed an actual cliff before, and it’s one of the coolest things I’ve done to date—the thrill of it is addictive.  I think about all the mountain activities I could be doing all summer instead of going back to Illinois…  So, after I repel down, I find Carly and tell her, “I want to live here.”  Her response: “Then do it.”

We’re back in Denver the next day to go to Dada Life at Red Rocks.  (We’re lowkey only going for Jauz, who is opening.)  Casey flies in for it, and the three of us reunited makes for a hell of a night.  After experiencing my first Red Rocks show, I decide it’s the best venue in the world.  Like whose idea was it??  Just..amazing.

Going to Red Rocks is supposed to be like that last banger a DJ drops at the end of their set; it’s supposed to close my trip out.  For most people, the stellar idea they had to just stay in Colorado and live in Breckenridge has lost much appeal by now.  By now, they’ve had plenty of time to convince themselves it just isn’t realistic.  Not me, sister!

I can’t stop daydreaming about it.  I’ve already started mapping out a plan—a way to make it happen.  Even though I just finished my junior year of college, I have only 6 credit hours left to complete before I can graduate.  I do some research and figure out I can take my last 2 classes online through my university.  If I’m gonna pull this off, I need to make sure I finish my degrees—that’s still a priority.

The night before my flight back to Illinois, my mom calls and asks if I’m coming home.  I swear I hadn’t said a word to my parents about potentially staying so I don’t know why she asks me that.  Maybe she’s joking, but I’m not when I tell her no…I don’t think I am.  Still not sure how my parents were able to keep it together.

They are neither encouraging nor discouraging.  My dad is mainly concerned about me getting a job, but I’m more concerned about housing since it’s limited and expensive in Breck.  And then there’s Carly, who’s basically bullying me into staying via aggressive encouragement and excitement at the idea of me staying in Colorado.

I mull it over a bit longer.  Each time my brain turns to thoughts of failure (“what if?” this and that), I automatically reroute it to the thought of how much I’ll regret going back to Illinois without at least trying.  There I’d be, probably doing research in a psychology lab on a campus I was ready to leave, gaining perfect experience for grad school, which I was definitely not planning for.  On the other hand, I could be hiking and rock-climbing mountains, camping, going to Red Rocks shows, meeting and befriending interesting people, experiencing things I never could if I went back.  And if I don’t do it now, when will I ever get the chance to?

So I tell Carly I’m in, I’m gonna do it!  I figure if anything, I’ll just fly home after a couple weeks if it doesn’t work out.  That was Plan Z though.  To make it official, Carly doesn’t let me print my Spirit boarding pass.  Soo I guess I’m staying in Colorado!

I hitch a ride back to Breck the next day with 2 duffel bags full of donations from Carly—I didn’t exactly come prepared to live in the mountains—and a case of beer to thank Kyle for letting me crash on his couch until I find a place to live.  I’m feeling alive and getting ready to make my Facebook post to let the world know.  But it’s feeling more and more real with every mile, and then it kind of hits me and I’m scared all over again.

I get dropped off at Kyle’s and stand in his living room for a minute.  Oh my god.  I know no one here.  I don’t have a job or a place to live.  What am I doing again??? ……… But I don’t really have time to freak out because it’s already happening, so I walk back outside and head to Main Street to get a job.

Four days later, I find a place to live.  After that, I spend a good amount of time wearing clothes and shoes that don’t fit me, going out alone to try and make friends, and feeling lonely and a little homesick.  It takes a few months for Breck to start feeling like home, but it doesn’t take me long to realize moving here was the best decision I’ve ever made in my life.

I end up living in Breck through the winter season, which is incredible.  By winter, I’ve met a good number of like-minded people who become some of my best friends.  Just as I finish my last class of college in early December (and graduate), I put in my first day skiing on the mountain.

I work a part-time evening job (in the Outbound Marketing call center for Breckenridge Grand Vacations), meaning I have the luxury of skiing every day of the week.  Sidenote, I LOVE my job.  I actually look forward to coming into work and finding out what kind of entertainment each day will bring, from my coworkers, managers, and even my leads.

I can see why people never leave this place.  Throughout the seasons, I pick up new hobbies—sailing, skiing, snowboarding, rock climbing, hiking 14ers, camping, cliff jumping—all things I’ve never done before in my life.  I make the goofiest, most genuine friends.  I experience so many incredible things simply by starting from scratch in an unfamiliar place.  All because of that one decision.

Sadly, my time in Breck comes to a close as I get ready to leave the playground at the end of April to move to Denver.  Breckenridge, you gave me everything you promised, from a mountain-sport-related injury to a lifestyle that felt like a never-ending vacation.  Most importantly, you taught me how to send it.